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- Kramer: I feel like I've had two lives. My pre-mousse, and now I begin my post-mousse.
Kramer: Well, occasionally I like to help the humans. -
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- George : Well I was dropping of the calzone money for the week .... Um
shouldn't you be at work by now ?
Newman : Work ? It's raining .
George : Soooooo
Newman : I called in sick . I don't work in the rain .
George : You don't work in the rain ? Your a mailman . " Neither rain nor sleet
nor snow ....." It's the first one .
Newman : I was never that big on creeds .
George : Look I need you to do me a favor . I need you to get me lunch at
Pisano's .
Kramer : What happened to Newman ?
George : He called in sick .
Kramer : Oh yeah right it's raining . the calzone - ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
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- Kramer: I got news for you: handicapped people, they don't even want to park there! They wanna be treated just like anybody else! That's why, those spaces are always empty.
George: He's right! It's the same thing with the feminists. You know, they want everything to be equal, everything! But when the check comes, where are they?
Elaine: What's that suppose to mean? the merv griffin -
- George: I'm a marine biologist.
- George: The sea was angry that day my friends, like an old man trying to send back soup at a deli.
- George: So I started to walk into the water. I won't lie to you boys, I was terrified! But I pressed on and as I made my way passed the breakers a strange calm came over me. I don't know if it was divine intervention or the kinship of all living things but I tell you Jerry at that moment I was a marine biologist!
- Elaine: George I was just reading this thing in the papers, it's amazing!
- George: I know I was just telling them the story.
- Kramer: Come on George, finish the story.
- George: I got about fifty-feet out and then suddenly the great beast appeared before me. I tell ya he was ten stories high if he was a foot. As if sensing my presence he gave out a big bellow. I said, "Easy big fella!" And then as I watched him struggling I realized something was obstructing his breathing. From where I was standing I could see directly into the eye of the great fish!
- Jerry: Mammal.
- George: Whatever.
- Kramer: Well, what did you do next?
- George: Then from out of nowhere a huge tidal wave lifted. Tossed like a cork, I found myself on top of him face to face with the blow-hole. I could barely see from all of the waves crashing down on top of me but I knew something was there so I reached my hand and pulled out the obstruction!
(George pulls out of the inside pocket a golf ball) (Jerry and George just stare at Kramer) - Kramer: What is that a Titleist? A hole in one, eh?
Kramer: I'm human... Jerry: In your way. Dean Jones: "I've been reviewing Darren's internship journal. Doing laundry, mending chicken wire, high tea with a Mr. Newman?" Kramer: "Well, it all sounds pretty glamourous, but it's business as usual at Kramerica." Dean Jones: "Far as I can tell, your entire enterprise is little more than a solitary man with a messy apartment which may or may not contain a chicken." Kramer: "And with Darren's help, we'll get that chicken!" Newman : All right . Then let me ask you this . Didn't you find it interesting that your friend had the foresight to purchase postal insurance for your stereo . Huh . I mean parcels are rarely damaged during shipping . Jerry : Define rarely . Newman : Frequently .
some random crazy dude doing standup and being a racist Kramer: Do you ever yearn? George: Yearn? Do I yearn? Kramer: I yearn. George: You yearn? Kramer: Oh, yes. Yes, I yearn. Often I sit...and yearn. Have you yearned? George: Well not recently. I craved.
Jerry: Oh you're crazy. Kramer: Am I? Or am I so sane that you just blew your mind? Jerry: It's impossible. Kramer: Is it? Or is it so possible that your head is spinning like a top? Jerry: It can't be. Kramer: Can't it? Or is your entire world just crashing down all around you? Jerry: Alright, that's enough.
looking for a coffee table book about coffee tables that actually is a coffee table? need a fusillii jerry for your apartment? cant find that butter shave kit?
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